Death and Life Lessons

Death is never a easy thing to deal with, no matter how close you are or aren't with the person.
Tomorrow would have been my Grandmas birthday, and today will make it a year since my best friends, Grandma passed away, so it is kind of fresh on my mind this week.
As the clock ticks and the days go by it gets a little easier and in time you don't even think about it, but sometimes maybe a smell, or activity, a place, a show, or even something as precious as a memory will bring them back and make you feel like they where here just yesterday. Everyone deals with death in their own personal way.. But no matter how we deal with it, its there to deal with it.

Its has only been 2 months and 2 weeks that I have had to learn how to deal with this, at times it feels like a life time and other times it feels like a day, I am not claiming to be expert I actually feel as if I know nothing about this and I honestly don't know why I am even blogging about it. But I have been thinking, what should I do tomorrow, should I go and be alone and reminisce her life, should I cry, should I be happy for the time I had with her, I still don't know what to do, I want to do what would be most beneficial for myself---does that make me selfish or smart?

What I am learning from all of this is life is uncertain and we may not know what "the best thing" is, but if you know its not wrong, why not just do it? Just do it and if it doesn't work out, don't do it again, or try it a different way.

Life can have a strange way of teaching us the lessons we need to learn, but if we learn from them the first time, chances are we wont have to watch or listen to the lesson again.
(I dont know what that has to do with anything I talked about, but it sounds good and I believe thats its true.)